When Longinotti-Buitoni took over Ferrari North America as CEO in the late 90s, the U.S. and Canada were in a recession. He couldn’t imagine people would spend their money on such an expensive, impractical car.
Since then, Longinotti-Buitoni has changed his mind.
What he learned was that the desire for a Ferrari comes from our dreams…not the part of our brain that balances the checkbook each month.
Those same dreams fuel our desire for leisure time. It fuels our desire for Gucci purses. Gulfstream jets. Beauty. Exotic vacations. And houses.
You, real estate agent, need to understand these dreams. And reinterpret a house in terms of your client’s fantasy world.
But it’s not about selling homes to people who apear on the cover of Vanity Fair. Average people like you and I have our own set of dreams to fulfill.
That’s why Volkswagon could sell a van called the Beetle to thousands of hippies. Our Levi’s could position a pair of denim jeans like a vein of gold in the foothills of California.
Think about Nike shoes and what they mean to inner-city kids: An escape from his oppressive origins.
Bottom line: People fantasize about the things they can’t afford. Selling a house to a buyer is all about tapping into that fantasy.
The best way I’ve found to do that is to simply show them their dream home. Yes, they might not know it’s their dream home. But when you roll up to the $500,000 house and they gasp, “There’s no way we can afford that,” you need to respond, “Let’s look at it anyway.”
Elevate their fantasy and anything you show them after that will seem below them. They will naturally gun for homes at their high-end of price.
What’s truly heartbreaking about this tactic, though, is this: It’s nothing more than the notorious takeaway. You’ve given them something they want…and now you take it away.
You see this when you prohibit your seven-year-old from playing his Nintendo DS. We, especially Americans, freak when we go from freedom back to bondage.
And bondage is exactly how it feels. No one likes going from abundance to lack. You’re constricted. Restrained.
And you lie awake dreaming about what you once had. Be it a million dollar home or $150,000 car.
Granted, you don’t want to set your client up to fail. So you must be careful when using this tactic. You must use common sense and constantly check in with your client to make sure he’s not getting in over his head.
Yet, this plays into the gambit in two ways.
One, you protect your client. Two, you demonstrate that you aren’t desperate for this deal. That you could walk away. That’s a powerful indication that there’s more to this sale than money, making the house all that more irresistable.
And if you like what you read, subscribe to the real estate marketing blog by email or news feed.
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Filed Under Real Estate Prospecting Ideas, Real Estate Sales Tips | Leave a Comment
Has this happened to you recently: you tend to become desperate in tight times by trying to aggressively pin down real estate buyers?
But did you know that removing pressure from the sales process will actually cause you to win more listings and prospects and sell more homes?
That’s right. A sales approach where you create pressure-free conversations with buyers is more effective.
However, to do that it’s essential that you eliminate behaviors and language that buyers can perceive as “aggressive.”
We all know what these are — continual e-mail and voicemail “followups” in which agents try to pin down the status of a potential real estate buyer– is one common example.
[And of course it's becoming more and more difficult to nail down a potential buyer in this market.]
The problem is that prospects react to aggressive–or perhaps we should say “overaggressive”–sales behaviors by withdrawing and evading us.
In fact, what you have to do instead of being passive or aggressive is this: you have to take the “middle ground” by being authentically unassuming, yet effective–and that this is the most stress-free and effective way to sell.
What do I mean by “authentically unassuming, yet effective”?
How to Discover a Whole New Effectiveness
For starters you have to shift away from assuming that every buyer is a fit for your any of your listings.
It’s sort of like the legal concept of “being innocent until proven guilty.”
You can’t afford to make any assumptions about “fit” until your conversation with the buyer indicates that you two mutually arrived at that conclusion.
The aggressiveness that turns off buyer sets in when you assume, every time you pick up the phone, that you have a solution for them.
Your tone of voice and language gives them that message long before they’ve even had a chance to agree that you have the home that they want.
But if you can manage to find that middle ground of not assuming anything while also communicating in a low-key, unassuming manner, you’ll discover a whole new effectiveness you could never have imagined.
Flawed Logic
Can prospects sense when you’re assuming too much? Sure they can–because most of us have been conditioned to present or talk about our solution as a way to engage prospects so they’ll reveal their problems to us.
But that logic is completely flawed.
When you launch into your speal to someone who doesn’t trust you yet, all you do is allow them to pigeonhole you as a stereotyped “salesperson.”
How to Become Unassuming but Effective
First, learn to start conversations by focusing 100 percent on generating discussions around your prospects’ problems, rather than pitching your listing inventory the second you hear an opening.
Second, learn to begin those conversations by converting the benefits of your homes into problems that your homes will actually solve.
Third, after you and your prospects have identified a desires or needs, you can then engage in a discussion about whether meeting those needs is a priority.
It’s only at that point that prospects have finally given you implicit permission to share your inventory with them.
Jumping in with solutions prematurely will only land you back in the trap of being perceived as “aggressive.”
What Do You Think?
Have you found yourself having to get aggressive? Do you approach this market differently since buyers have tightened the purse strings? Or are you in one of these bubble-proof markets?
Let me know what you think.
And if you like what you read, subscribe to the real estate marketing blog by email or news feed.
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The key to being successful is sweating the small stuff. That comes down to the very words that you use. That’s why I’ll always encourage you to paint persuasive word pictures for your clients.
But don’t stop there.
Avoid those words that raise flags for buyers and sellers. Words that paint ugly, bad pictures–albeit, stereotypes–of salespeople.
Following is a list of Tom Hopkin’s “Thou shalt not say” words. Words that generate pictures of sleazy car salesmen, images of big city political hustlers. Words that put prospects on the defensive, out of the buying mood.
“Cost” or “Price.”
Here’s what your client sees when you say these words: Money leaving their wallet. Instead, say “total investment,” which creates a picture of putting your money to work.
“Monthly Payment”
Picture of bills. And they already have too many of those.
Instead, say “monthly investment.” Again, a picture of putting your hard-earned dollars to work, which everyone enjoys hearing.
“Sell” or “Sold”
Picture of being pushed or pressured. Think telemarketers and resort sellers.
Instead, say “get involved with” or “helped you acquire.” Pictures of participation and benevolence. Big difference here.
“This Will Be a Good Deal.”
(Personal pet peeve of mine.) Picture of back office, city politics. The pool hall deal. Used car lot negotiations. It’s got corruption written all over it.
Instead, say “opportunity.” “This will be a good opportunity.” Ah. Need I say more?
“Just Sign Here.”
You’re client or prospect sees you holding them hostage to an agreement–forever. Will spook even the most seasoned home buy, I bet.
Instead, say “endorse,” “authorize” or “approve the paperwork.” Pictures of you in the driver’s seat, you with the power.
Conclusion
Remember: a successful sale is made up of dozens–if not hundreds–of smaller parts. Success comes together like a deliberate, systematic arrangement of jigsaw puzzle pieces.
That means the words you use are just some of those parts. A tiny part, yes, but could be the very hinge that closes the door on your “opportunity.” Let me know what you think.
Did you find this article useful? If so, leave a comment. And if you like what you read, subscribe to the Real Estate Marketing Blog.
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The numbers game will wear you out. It will leave you dissatisfied, frustrated, and rejected.
The whole idea of the numbers game is that if you spend enough time dialing, churning through prospects, you’re bound to make the occasional sale.
Burn and churn, baby.
Problem is, when you do make a sale, you believe even more that the number of prospects you burned through was the secret to success.
“I made 100 calls and got 2 deals.” So you make more calls. “If I make 1,000 calls I’ll get 20 deals.”
The thing is, real estate is not a game of small-scale volume. You don’t work for Wal-Mart.
Outside of the exhaustion and relentless rejection behind this approach, here’s the real tragedy: its not about how many sales you are making…but how many sales you are losing.
Count the Cost
Is it really worth mowing through 1,000 calls to get 20 deals? Some might say yes.
But what if I could show you a way were you could mosey through half as many calls and still make 20 deals?
Think about it.
When you’re operating out of the old numbers game paradigm, how many leads do you burn through with every call you make?
And how much time do you spend chasing and following up with prospects who will probably never work with you?
It’s really a bad deal to get into. It’s a treadmill.
And I’ll go on the record as saying that yes, some real estate agents love burning through a list and yes, they will actually make very good money doing it, but…
Just because they’re really good at it and it’s the way they found success, doesn’t mean that it IS the only way to success. If they believe this, then they suffer from the I’m-a-hammer-and-everything-else-is-a-nail-syndrome.
Don’t fall under this guy’s spell. He’ll wear you out. No, he’ll chew you up and spit you out. And when you fail, he’ll make you feel like its your fault.
But it’s not. The approach is just not for you.
Dr. Bernie Siegel said “It was impossible to fail with the parents I had. If I got an F in Music, they’d look at me and say, ‘I guess you’re not a musician’.”
How to Carve Out an Approach That Is Right for You
If something about the burn and churn approach doesn’t sit right with you, reconsider your options. In all probability, if it doesn’t sit right with you it’s because it’s an old school approach inappropriate for our current economic view.
I can’t think of any consumer who appreciates cold calling, hustling, rapid fire questions, impatience.
Besides, when you churn and burn you’ll soon find you’re trapped, making huge numbers of calls to reach that tiny percentage of prospects who will buy from you.
In a nutshell, here’s the ugliness of churn and burn:
- Burning through calls involves huge investments of time and energy to achieve a few successes.
- Numbers-game scripts talk at prospects and lead to rejection in all but a tiny percentage of calls.
- Prospects know that they’re just a phone number to you and that you’re not interested in engaging them on a human level.
- The only goal is to move the sale forward, or to get a quick “no” so you can move on to the next call.
The mystique of the old numbers game is that you’re bound to “hit” once in a while.
But people who sell the old way never ask themselves how many opportunities they’ve lost in a day because they haven’t gotten to the truth with their prospects.
Now, when you focus on quality rather than volume, when you focus on building a relationship instead of closing a deal, when you focus on every call is a chance to unearth a possible client.
That means your calls have to be more thoughtful and efficient.
And you have to walk into them with this mindset: I’m simply here to say hello to this person.
Now this doesn’t exclude you from the ABC rule: Always Be Closing. If you can bump the fruit into your basket in under five minutes to get a contract, by all means do so.
Here are a few tips to consider when making phone calls to prospects:
- Starting calls with a focused problem statement makes it easy to create two-way dialogue.
- Your attentiveness to your prospects’ concerns makes a real human connection possible.
- The goal is to learn the truth and explore there’s a fit between your solution and your prospect’s problem or concern.
- And when you’ve learned the truth, whether the answer is a yes or a no, rejection is impossible.
Conclusion
If you’re feeling guilty that you should be playing the old numbers game because your colleagues are making sales from it, consider this: All you’re seeing from them is how many sales they are making–not how many sales they’re losing.
And consider that by refocusing your attention on the quality of each call versus the volume of calls, you can experience new sales success you may never have thought possible.
For more information, see my short story about Tammy and Rick, southern Illinois agents making it happen in this recession. [About half way down the page.]
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Leave a comment if this post was helpful or if you have anything you’d like to add. And if you like what you read, subscribe to the Real Estate Marketing Blog by email or news feed.
The reason most prospects lie to you is that they have multiple layers of sales resistance.
Traditionally the sale model has always been about advancing the sale. Well, the people in your market place are fed up with the traditional sales model.
People are tired of being manipulated.
Inwardly, the prospect you’re dealing with simply wants to be treated like a person. And all too often the sales dialogs or scripts you’re using are structured with the sales process in mind first—and not the person on the other end.
Think about it from your own experiences.
How many times have you been approached and you knew the top priority of the salesperson was to advance the sale? The car salesmen. The insurance agent. They cared more about their agenda than they did about you.
As Greg Swan said, Life stinks when your heads up your….
Death to the Traditional Sales Model
Well the person you’re attempting to serve is no different. People have become extremely sensitive to the slightest hint of anything to do with the sales process.
Yes. I’m an advocate of becoming highly skilled with questions so you can diagnose your client’s needs [critical if you want to earn a paycheck in this soft market].
BUT…you’ve got to be very careful. You have to be very delicate and super-sensitive to the person you’re talking to…and their needs.
And the best thing I’ve found to help remove sales resistance is to completely let go of your sales agenda. I mean throw it out the window. Focus totally and completely on their needs—not your goals.
The real goal should be to get to a genuine, authentic dialog with that person.
By getting to what sales trainer Ari Galper refers to as the real truth, you’re positioning yourself to be a true problem solver.
But until you get to the real truth you’re actually stuck in somewhat of a guessing game.
See oddly enough, over time, it has become completely socially acceptable to lie to salespeople.
Why? Because the overriding opinion about salespeople is they’re only interested in getting the sale.
The worst part is all the sales models, all the sales training, all the traditional tools have been teaching us to advance the sales process. Well guess what? People have figured the process out.
They can smell it from a mile away. And if they catch even the slightest trace that you’re attempting to advance the sale…you’ve lost the game.
Once they sense that you’re in any way attempting to advance your agenda…you’ll never get to the real truth.
And unconsciously they will feel completely justified in lying to you.
4 Hidden Pressure Points
Whenever potential clients feel sales pressure, they almost always respond with defense and resistance and lying. Hidden sales pressure takes many forms. If we can avoid the ways we bring sales pressure into our cold calling, then we can stop triggering this response.
Here are four hidden sales pressures that we bring to our cold calling:
1. Focusing On the Sales Agenda
If you’re like most people who make cold calls, you’re hoping to make a sale — or at least an appointment — before you even pick up the phone. The problem is the people you call somehow almost immediately notice your mindset.
They sense that you are only focused on your goals and interests, rather than on finding out what they might need or want. This short-circuits the whole process of communication and trust building.
So try this. Practice shifting your mental focus into thinking, “When I make this call, first I’m going to build a conversation. From this, a level of trust can emerge which allows us to exchange information back and forth. And then we can both determine if there’s a fit or not.”
When your focus shifts from making a sale into making a conversation, there’s no sales pressure. Many people enjoy conversations. Moreover, as long as you’re sincere, this will be one of them.
2. Talking About Ourselves First
When we start our cold calls with a mini-pitch about who we are and what we have to offer, we’ve introduced sales pressure right away. The other person knows we want to make a sale, and they have to respond to that pressure. Most will respond with defense or rejection or lying.
So instead, start your conversation by focusing on a need or issue you know the other person is likely facing. Step into their world and invite them to share whether they’re open to exploring possible solutions with you.
3. Forcing the Conversation into a Pre-Planned Strategy or Script
Here’s a hard one to avoid if we’re using scripts or carefully planned cold calling strategies.
When we rely on these methods, it’s usually because we just don’t know how else to “do” cold calling. However, when we take charge of a conversation in this way, the other person almost always feels like they are being maneuvered. That’s pressure.
I’m not suggesting that we don’t prepare and plan for our cold calls. There are some really good ways to begin cold calls that we’ll want to use over and over. Additionally, there are special phrases we can use that convey well the fact that we’re interested in solving a problem for the other person.
What we want to avoid, however, is trying to control a cold calling conversation. This almost always happens with scripts and old-style sales strategies. Potential clients feel this pressure and respond negatively.
4. Bubbling with Over-Enthusiasm
The problem with over-enthusiasm in our conversations is that the other person has to make a decision whether to buy into our perspective, or reject it. They feel the hidden sales pressure that wants them to be carried along with our enthusiasm. This usually means braking, whether gently or abruptly.
With over-enthusiasm (which is often just an offshoot of our tension), potential clients feel somewhat boxed in. They feel the pressure of our expectations so they feel compelled to respond either positively or negatively. Most will almost always respond negatively.
So chill out.
Conclusion
Eliminating all sales pressure from your conversations will invite the other person to respond much more warmly and positively.
And the best way to do that is to completely throw out your sales agenda. Focus on diffusing pressure. This is a gentle process where you carefully use language that demonstrates you’re only interested in serving them.
Leave a comment if this post was helpful or if you have anything you’d like to add. And if you like what you read, subscribe to the Real Estate Marketing Blog by email or news feed.
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Filed Under Real Estate Prospecting Ideas, Real Estate Sales Tips | 1 Comment
Anne G. reviews the MLS to make sure she knows all of the new listings that might be of interest to her buyers–instead of following up on her leads.
Hank M. defers his follow up calls so he can build his industry knowledge by reading journals and newsletters.
And Chris H. finds herself giving in to the impulse to write proposals for prospective clients rather than pick up the phone.
What do these three real estate agents share in common? You probably guessed it, call reluctance.
Call reluctance is the “social disease of the sales profession.” Each year, call reluctance single-handedly accounts for over half of all failures in one of the largest professions in the world.
In their book Earning What You’re Worth, researchers George Dudley and Shannon Gooson write that as many as 80 percent of all salespeople who fail within their first year do so because of insufficient call activity.
Unresolved call reluctance can cause frustration and loss of sales. So with this in mind, how do you overcome call reluctance?
Here are five tips:
1. Aim for a number of calls you will make each day. Make this goal small and comfortable.
2. Next, increase the daily number of calls you will make. Do this slowly. Here you will start to see that you don’t encounter the bad things you imagined, or, if you do, you find out that you can handle them.
3. Record each call. In a notebook strictly devoted to your sales calls, make notes about things you should have done differently. Keep this notebook handy whenever you make sales calls and review it every day before you make phone calls.
4. Realize the difference between real and imaginary threats. Over time you will recognize that ninety-nine times out of a hundred the bad things you thought would happen, don’t. And if you do experience rejection or fear, realize it’s not personal. The caller is rejecting your offer, not you.
5. Report to an accountability person. Whether it’s you’re spouse or friend, broker or coach, invite someone to help you stay on track and meet your goals.
Caution: Research shows that successful people do the hard things other people refuse to do. Work through these five steps only if you want to break through to the next level. Follow the footsteps of the successful now and within time you will prosper.
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Leave a comment if this post was helpful or if you have anything you’d like to add. And if you like what you read, subscribe to the Real Estate Marketing Blog by email or news feed.
Wendy Kopp’s Elegant Idea to Growing Your Business
Filed Under Leadership, Real Estate Sales Tips | 6 Comments
Last Monday I asked the question: “Why would anyone in there right mind work with fewer people?”
If you still think it’s either impossible or a bad idea to limit who you work with, read this following story. It should convince you of the power of selectivity. [via]
The idea: convince Harvard graduates to teach in America’s roughest public schools
In th spring of 1988, Wendy Kopp graduated from Princeton with an idea: why not convince graduates from leading universities to spend the first two years of their careers teaching low income kids in the public education system?
She had no money, no office, no infrastructure, no name, no credibility, no furniture, not even a bed or a dresser in which to store her clothes. Leaving Princeton, Kopp moved into a small room in New York City and approached the Mobil Corporation.
Once Mobil agreed to grant $26,000 of seed capital to fund her idea, Teach for America, Kopp spent the next 365 days in a juggling act–convincing top-flight people to join her bus with the promise that she would convince donors to fund the bus… while at the same time convincing donors that she would convince top-flight people to join her bus….
One year later, Kopp stood in front of 500 recent graduates from colleges like Yale, Harvard and Michigan. These graduates assembled for training and deployment into America’s under served classrooms.
And how did she convince these graduates to work for low pay in tough classrooms?
First, by tapping their idealistic passions. Second by the making the process selective.
She basically said to all these overachieving college students: “If you’re really good, you might be able to join our cause. But first you have to submit to a rigorous screening and evaluation process. You should prepare yourself for rejection, because it takes special capability to succeed in these classrooms.”
Selectivity led to credibility with donors, which increased funding, which made it possible to attract and select even more people into the programs.
As of 2005, more than 97,000 individuals applied to be part of Teach for America and only 14,100 made the cut, while revenues grew to nearly $40 million in annual support.
Wendy Kopp understood three fundamental points.
First, the more selective the process, the more attractive a position becomes–even if volunteer or low pay. The same is true if people are paying you.
Second, the social sectors have one compelling advantage: desperate craving for meaning in our lives.
Purity of mission–be it about educating people, connecting people to God, making our cities safe, touching the soul with great art, feeding the hungry, serving the poor, or protecting our freedom–has the power to ignite passsion and commitment.
Third, the number one resource for a great organization is having enough of the right people willing to commit themselves to mission.
In real estate, this translates to creating momentum–a flywheel–that will eventually turn by itself.
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Filed Under Leadership, Real Estate Sales Tips | Leave a Comment
Machiavelli. Hobbes. Nietzsche.
These classical thinkers and their power philosophies may guide the behavior of the world’s dictators…but they are grossly inconsistent with true ethical leadership in real estate sales.
Case in point: If we judge according to a high standard of leadership, Hitler, Idi Amin, and Jim Jones were never leaders despite enormous but temporary power and materialistic success. [Neither were these naughty agents ever leaders.]
Louis B. Lundborg states this truth:
“A leader is one whom others will follow willingly and voluntarily. That rules out tyrants, bullies, autocrats and all other who use coercive power to impose their will on others.”
Or as Kenneth O. Gangel correctly observes:
“Leadership is not political powerplay. Leadership is not authoritarian attitude. Leadership is not cultic control.”
Yet we must never think that a leader is powerless…
The World’s Idea of Power Is False
Indeed, to suggest that a leader is without authority is to pose the anomaly of a leader with no followers. In fact, leadership is a special kind of authority: legitimized power–the power of ethical, inspiring influence and enablement.
This kind of authority can be awesome in its effect upon individuals and families and colleagues. It is the kind of power an excellent teacher or guide brings to bear upon the people he or she serves.
Legitimized power avoids manipulative tactics to enhance the leaders status or to accomplish the leader’s agenda. The real ultimate test of genuine leadership is the realization of enduring change that meets people’s most basic physical, emotional and spiritual needs.
There is the almost irresistible tendency to judge leadership by production statistics and materialist standards and to grant esteem and promotion to such successful people.
But if actual needs in the lives of people are not met…no meaningful leadership has taken place despite whatever production numbers were exceeded or income achieved.
Leadership Versus Management
We should distinguish between leadership and management, although sometimes the differences are pushed too far and become contrived. Of course, there is overlap, and the differences are not always crystal clear.
As is obvious, a good leader must have good management skills, and good managers usually have leadership qualities. It is difficult to imagine a good manager who is not also a good leader and vice versa.
- Vision: A leader has greater vision than a manager. Leaders go beyond the day to day and see the whole relationship in the scope of a lifetime. Leaders envision objectives never dreamed of. And they inspire others to share those dreams.
- Renewal: Leaders want change. They want revision of process and structure, with an eye toward changing outmoded methods, defining new goals, tapping new resources, motivating or enlisting personnel and invigorating the family, the company and it’s individuals. Managers give directions and evaluate performance. Leaders stimulate achievement and energize everyone. Leaders are more creative, innovative and transforming.
- Orientation: Leaders are people-oriented. They think in terms of people and their needs. Managers think about getting things done. Managers tend to be more task- and program- and profit-oriented. Leaders think about doing right things to help people maximize their potentials. Managers supervise people, but leaders energize people.
5 Essential Leadership Strategies
Real leaders must be distinguished from mere power wielders. Real estate leaders never use people to accomplish their own agendas, but inspire others to achieve their own goals. The test of genuine leadership is change that meets family and personal needs and enables people to feel fulfilled after the transaction is done.
The primary task of good leaders in influencing people are:
- Leaders listen. Their decisions and actions are based on real understanding of their clients needs.
- Leaders build cooperation. They never set out to use people to accomplish their goals and purposes. They disavow personal partisanship in favor of developing a spirit of cooperation and loyalty.
- Leaders inspire. And then get out of the way. Good leaders infuse others with an animating, quickening and exalting spirit of enthusiasm for the task of buying and selling a home. They do this primarily through their personal optimism, authenticity, enthusiasm and example.
- Leaders emphasize values. They focus on the fundamentals of value systems, reasons, philosophies, intrinsic truths, structures, objectives, designs, moods, emotions and environment.
- Leaders balance priorities. There is always awareness of the person, the family and the job to be done. No one of these is sacrificed for the benefit of the other.
In fulfilling these primary tasks of leadership, the real estate agent may do a variety of other things, yet all is done under the spirit of personal value, cooperation and service.
Now it’s your turn: tell me about leaders in your life who have had a profound impact on you? Did they use any of these strategies? If not, what made them leaders in your eyes? What strategies am I missing?
Pleasure and Pain: The Seemingly Dark Art of Manipulation
Filed Under Real Estate Negotiation, Real Estate Sales Tips | Leave a Comment
One of the most powerful ways to generate direct marketing responses is to set out reasons why responding to your offer brings wonderful pleasure and why not responding sustains or even increases pain.
Whenever you can, set up pleasure and pain offers. You can do this even in face to face presentations.
Tell your prospects all the good things that come by working with you or buying a particular home…
And then suggest the bad things that may occur (or remain the same) by not responding.
Articulating pleasure and pain offers simply means telling people the favorable consequences of accepting your offer and the undesirable consequences of doing nothing.
Here are a couple of examples:
Why They Should Choose You as Their Agent
- Pleasure: “Sell your home for the most money, in the fastest time and simplest way because I use proven marketing methods and have a vast network.”
- Pain: “Choose a different agent and you may end up working with inexperienced, careless, even thoughtless agents that will drag the sale of your home own for ages, refuse to negotiate and market the home as minimally as possible.”
Why They Should Buy That Particular Home
- Pleasure: “End constant frustration with limited storage space, enjoy vaulted ceilings, ample sunlight and a vast, fenced in yard.”
- Pain: “Skip this opportunity now and the next buyer strolling up may beat you to the punch.”
Why It Makes Sense to Put an Offer On This Home Now
- Pleasure: “Position yourself to move into this home sooner rather than later, besides…”
- Pain: “Waiting to put an offer on this home might allow another buyer to come in and put an offer on it and then the seller may like the idea of a price war, which means the highest bidder wins.”
Pain Is Not Torture, If…
To some this may seem like manipulation. In my mind, as long as you are telling the truth and not withholding certain truth…it is not manipulation.
You are giving facts to a person to help them make a decision. Ari Galper’s got this down pat.
One thing that is extremely helpful when working with pleasure and pain offers is that you believe in yourself–and what you are doing.
If you don’t believe in yourself and don’t believe or enjoy what you are doing…then your resistance to this approach maybe a symptom to something deeper: job dissatisfaction, low-self esteem, insecurity.
I confess: I struggled early in my career with face to face sales simply because I was insecure. But that was not all…
Then I discovered I was an introvert. And that explained a lot.
Figuring out that I was an introvert [and being okay with it!] helped me to operate where I could be the most productive.
Writing is infinitely easier to me than face to face. I eat, sleep, read writing. It comes very natural. Face to face, on the other, is a vicious exercise of the will.
What that tells me is that I need to spend most of my time behind a keyboard. I’m very comfortable behind a keyboard, and salesmanship in print is very easy for me.
Still Not Comfortable with Manipulation? Think About This
Now, if telling people the truth about the pleasure and pain of certain decisions still feels below you and you are certain you are not insecure or introverted or in the wrong job altogether, then consider other issues outside of buying or selling a home.
Like drug addiction.
Would you be manipulating someone if you told them the pleasures of not doing drugs (stability in your life and freedom from worry about cash, cops or crashes)…
And then the pain of drug addiction (broken relationships, poor job performance, financial ruin)?
Consider this approach to other weighty issues, like teen pregnancy and smoking. Then move across the spectrum to subtler issues, say choosing a college, and finally buying a home.
I think you’ll see that it’s not manipulation when you are sincerely concerned for the other person and are simply putting all the cards on the table.
Even better is this: If you can remain objective during the process and even say, “You know, this may not even be the home for you. I just wanted you to know all the facts.”
If you’ve ever wondered what The Bridge on the River Kwai, psychotic strangers, Abraham Maslow, concrete rebar and flaky surgeons have to do with persuasion and sales skills then you’ll want to read this…
The Surprise Hero of the Story
In the movie The Bridge on the River Kwai Alec Guinness plays the part of the British officer who is tortured by the Japanese to force his men to build a bridge that has military value to the Japanese.
Guinness finally consents when he thinks that perhaps allowing his men to build the bridge would be good therapy for them.
His men on the other hand think its some kind of trick. They think they are supposed to sabotage the bridge. What they don’t understand is the mindset of this British officer.
Guinness plays a character who takes pride in his country, his army, his work. Delivering anything less than the best is not in his thoughts. In fact, he wants to prove to the Japanese that the British build the finest bridges in the world.
The interesting turn in the story occurs when an American solider arrives trying to destroy the bridge. Alec Guinness fights to keep the solider from blowing up the bridge, a bridge that is helping the Japanese fight the Americans.
Now let me ask you: who’s the hero of the story?
It’s not William Holden. It’s Alec Guinness. Why is that?
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
Abraham Maslow years ago presented an idea known as the “heirarchy of needs.” In his representation of this hierarchy of needs, he’s set up a pyramid:
1. Survival
2. Security
3. Social
4. Self-Esteem
5. Self-Actualization
The idea is that through life you gradually work your way up that pyramid.
As a baby, your only concern is food, water, sleep. As you get older, you realize that your parents and the house you live in protects you. About age 3 you understand that the world does not revolve around you. About 13 you kind of return back to yourself, craving to feel important, to be independent.
And finally, you want to have purpose. Not only that, but you want to achieve all of your dreams. You want to burn up, not burn out.
Later in his life, though, Maslow added to more needs: the need for consistency and the need for order.
This is the answer to why Alec Guinness is the hero of the Bridge Over River Kwai.
He’s a person that is consistent and predictable. He has a set of values that he does not waver from.
In fact, if you remember, in the early part of the movie you see this as he endures enormous torture from heat and isolation, but never backs down from his original statement. It’s not until he’s relieved and allowed to determine their fate.
This means he’s a person who can be trusted.
How This Applies to Real Estate
Imagine if this happened to you:
A surgeon says, “Sorry to say this, but you are going to need a quadruple bypass surgery.”
And you say, “Can’t we just do a double bypass?”
He then replies, “Alright, we’ll do a double and see how you do after that.”
How secure would you feel after that?
The same applies in business and persuasion. In fact, a huge part of persuasion deals with consistency.
The rule of thumb is this: we tend to trust the people who are reliable, consistent and predictable.
Say you live in house on a street with just one other house. You’re not going to trust the total stranger who moves in there until he demonstrates he’s stable, consistent or predictable.
If he proves himself to be off his rocker or strange or unpredictable, do you think you are going to trust him if he comes over and says, “Hey, can I borrow your car? I need to run to the store.”
I hope not.
Neither should your clients trust you if you blow off phone calls or cave in at every suggestion. Don’t be surprised if you can’t get them to agree with anything you suggest.
I find it impossible to respect, let alone trust, someone who is flaky, shallow or weak. What about you?
On the flip side of it, demonstrate that you are a person of consistency and you will have people eating out of your hand [okay, maybe that's a little dramatic, but you get my point].
Consistency in behavior, especially in difficult or tense times, is the biggest part to influencing people.
That’s why it’s so imporatnt to figure out what you stand for, what your values are, what makes you tick, what ticks you off.
Create that marketing plan, dust off that personal mission statement.
Then it’s important to get a backbone as rigid as rebar. If you want to be a person of influence then you need to have what it takes to stand the heat.
If you don’t, then you are making a big mistake.
Expect people to walk over you. More importantly, expect to feel like your life is out of control, that you are a victim.